How it all works
Understand the basics of separation, how you can use our website and what support services may be suitable for your situation.
What is My Separate Path?
My Separate Path is your comprehensive guide to understanding separation and divorce in Malaysia.
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Our aim is to provide you simple, understandable advice to manage yourself and your relationships throughout your journey.
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We want you to feel supported with a sense of courage as you take your first few steps.
How do I use My Separate Path?
You can use our website as a resource to understand the various options for your potential separation. You can also download our Questionnaire, fill it out and use it as a basis to send to the support services that you may need.
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It helps you by not needing to repeat your situation again and again, and makes their job easier by having a concise document that outlines your circumstances.
I am not sure if I want to separate from my partner
We recommend that you engage a counsellor or coach to discuss your thoughts and feelings about your partner. You can choose to do this separately or together with your partner.
I have decided to separate. What are my options?
As a non-Muslim, there are 4 ways to start your separation journey.
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1. Self service separation
If you and your partner are stable and mature, you can write a separation agreement yourselves and represent yourselves in court. This is referred to as a joint petition, uncontested case, and can take up to 9 months to process. It is the fastest and cheapest approach to move towards the next steps in life.
If however, your case is complex; even if you are mature and stable, you may want to engage a third party to help you draft your separation agreement.
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2. Mediated separation
Mediated separation is similar to self service separation. However, the addition of a certified mediator for you and your partner makes the process more independent.
They provide independent and impartial support for you both at the same time, by helping you agree on the fairness in your separation agreement.
You all work together to come to a mutual grounds on how your individual future can be post separation.
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3. Negotiated separation
A negotiated separation is where you and your partner engage lawyers separately. It is usually the case when both parties do not agree to a separation or divorce, or cannot come to terms on a mutually beneficial separation agreement. This is referred to as a single petition or contested case, and depending on the amicability of you and your partner can take from months to years to resolve.
4. Court decided separation
With this path, you and your partner are represented by a separate lawyers in court. A judge will decide on your separation, assets, family arrangements and any other special conditions that they feel necessary.
Depending on the complexity of your case, the court process can take months to years to complete. As a result, your legal fees will also rise accordingly.
Which separation path is suitable for me?
Ultimately, it all depends on your relationship with your partner. The more open, transparent and aligned in your feelings and thoughts regarding separation, you can consider a self service or mediated separation.
A negotiated or court decided separation may be your only option if the above does not hold true.
What is the best way to talk to separation support services?
Fill out our Questionnaire and send it to them, so they can understand your situation. They then may reach out to you to learn more about you and your case. As you talk to them, feel free to use the method that makes you most comfortable, whether virtually or in-person.
Your aim should be to find a service provider that makes you feel at ease throughout the process.
Are there any arrangements I need to make along the way?
Yes. As you proceed down your separation path, you should think about the impact to your family and daily life. Think practically:
A place for your children to live.
How to break the news to them, friends and family.
Plans for where you will live.
How much income you will need to sustain your lifestyle.
What will happen to your assets and debt.
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Taking time to reflect on your situation is important. Use our Questionnaire to document it all in a single place.
Finances
Separation has the possibility to change lives, both positively and negatively . Ensure that you understand what separating may mean to your finances, and what you need to achieve a result that is fair for you and your partner.
How much does it cost to separate?
It depends on how mutual the separation is between you and your partner.
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For a simple case where you both agree on your separation agreement, mediator or legal fees can be below RM 5,000. However, where the case is complex and you and your partner are not aligned, costs can run into the tens of thousands.
Generally speaking, if you need to go to court at any point, the costs will escalate quickly.
It is in your best interest to try and avoid this; an option that we at My Separate Path also encourage.
What is the cost breakdown?
For a simple separation, some indicative fees could be:
Certified mediator fees < RM 2,000.
Court fees < RM 1,000.
Legal fees < RM 5,000.
Commissioner of Oaths < RM 10.
Marriage Tribunal Costs < RM 10.
Property Sale Costs follow standard stamp duty and legal costs.
Property Transfer Costs are only exempt on stamp duty between husband and wife.
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Use our Questionnaire to send to a few service providers so they can inform you about current market practices.
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How can I pay for my separation costs?
Typically people pay for their separation through personal savings or through a personal bank loan.
Some people take loans from their friends or family, or some sell an asset that they own.
Your own individual situation is unique, so you must assess your potential costs and how to fund them.
How are my assets going to be separated in court?
The court will very rarely split assets and liabilities equally. Their aim is to provide a fair split, based on the present and potential future of you and your partner.
Remember, if there are children involved, the court will take their future wellbeing as a priority in decision making.
What assets get split?
Everything of significant value that you and your partner own may be considered an asset under consideration. This includes vehicles, property, cash and even EPF.
Your liabilities will also need to be split, including bank or car loans, PTPTN and other debt.
How do I calculate my assets?
Use our Questionnaire to document all of the assets that you and your partner own. This will make it easier for your support services to understand the complexity of your case and minimize your cost in the separation process.
Do I need an accountant or financial advisor?
Maybe. It all depends on how savvy you are with your finances.
A good accountant or financial advisor can help you understand all of your numbers, ensuring that you, and eventually the court, don't miss anything.
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In particular, if you are selling property to your partner, you may have to pay Real Property Gains Tax (RPGT). So, financial advice could be necessary if you're not aware of how this works.
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Property
The property that you and your partner own will also need to be split, and/or your living arrangements settled for you and your family. This is one of the most complicated items to settle.
What happens to our shared property?
If you and your partner are amicable in your separation, one of you may decide to buy out the other party. This is the easiest option.
Alternatively, you may decide to sell the property and split the proceeds in a way that you both agree upon; either through self service separation or mediated separation.
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If you choose the path of mediated or court decided separation, the fate of your property will most likely be left to the court. They may choose to place any property in the hands of one of you, depending on your current and future circumstances.
How much is my property worth?
You can do a quick check for similar properties around your area on PropertyGuru or iProperty.
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However, if you want a professional opinion which may be useful later on, then we suggest to engage a valuation consultancy. They will calculate a price on the value of your particular property and issue an official report.
This is especially useful if you and your partner cannot agree to the value of your property when calculating your assets and liabilities.
What happens to my housing loan?
If your housing loan has both of your names as co-borrowers, you will need to arrange with the bank to change this. You or the court may decides this, depending on your separation path.
That being said, it is still ok to keep both of your names as co-borrowers even after you separate. This will need very strong communication and trust between you and your now ex-partner.
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If you decide to buy out your partner from your property, you will need a new loan from the bank, based on your own income, assets etc.
Talk to your bank early for any of these options, it could take some time.
Do I have to move out post separation?
Not at all. If you and your now ex-partner are on good terms, you can have any living arrangement that works for you.
Even if you do decide to move out at any point during the separation process, it does not mean that you lose the asset. This is a misconception that many people have.
How do I sell my property to my partner?
Just like any other property sale, this involves the Land Office, where the title of the property can be transferred officially once you sell to your partner.
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Documents required may include:
1. The Sales and Purchase Agreement (SPA) that has been executed and stamped between you and your partner.
2. The original SPA of the property.
3. The Memorandum of Transfer (MOT).
4. Quit rent payment receipt of the current year.
5. Latest Assessment Tax payment receipt.
6. The original land title.
7. Deed of Assignment if the bank still holds your title.
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You will need to pay stamp duty, legal fees and potentially Real Property Gains Tax (RPGT).
It is worthwhile engaging a conveyancing lawyer to assist you.
What if I want to transfer my property to my partner?
The Land Office also regulates such processes. In general it is much simpler than a property sale and takes from between 3-7 months, depending on the type of property.
Stamp Duty is exempt between husband and wife transfers. However if transferring to other family members, this exemption is capped for properties up to RM 1,000,000.
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Also to note, a transfer of property can only take place if the housing loan has been fully settled. If this is not the case, you or your partner will need to settle the loan first. If this is your situation, talk to your bank about possible solutions.
Family
Finding the best way to sort out the separation with your family is a challenge, particularly if you have children that still require parental support.
Can my child decide who they want to stay with?
Yes, your child can have a view on who they want to stay with. That being said, if your separation is a court decided one, the judge will only take this into consideration as part of their final decision.
Custody will stop when your child reaches 18 years old or has finished their studies, whichever is later.
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Naturally, if your child has special needs, this will take priority in the court deciding when custody should stop.
How does the court decide who gets our children?
The number 1 priority of the court is any children's well being. This means the court will take into account who has the necessary means to support the child as they grow. This includes financially as well as emotionally.
Each separation case is unique, and based on your individual circumstances, the outcome is difficult to predict.
Can I visit my children if I don't get custody?
Yes, usually the court will decide on a visitation plan, assuming that you and your partner cannot come to an agreement yourselves.
How do we tell our family about our separation?
There are many ways to do this, depending on the maturity of your family members. In particular, if you are going to tell your children, it is important that you and your partner are calm, rational and respectful towards each other. This sets a positive tone towards your children.
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For your other friends and family members, you will need to gauge the right timing and method of communication yourselves. Sometimes a coach can help you in this; so don't be afraid to get the support you need.
How are my pets taken care of in a separation?
For all intents and purposes, your pets are considered property under Malaysian law.
So, the court will use their standard process in determining how property and assets are split.
If you do not want the court to decide on the future of your pets, it is advisable to draft an Arrangement for Pets yourself and agree with your partner beforehand.
Can I get alimony from my ex-partner?
The court can decide on alimony from husband to wife. This can depend on the living standard and current conditions of the wife during the marriage, as well as the future prospects for her post separation. Naturally the income and prospects of the husband are taken into account in any court decided alimony in this case.
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In cases a wife can also be asked to pay alimony to a husband in the case where the husband is physically or mentally ill.
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The court will also take into account who may have caused the separation, and adjust the alimony amounts based on this.
Of course, if you both mutually agree to separate and can both agree on alimony payments outside of court, this is the best route.
Legal
Almost every separation case requires legal support, even if they are truly mutual. It is always advisable to find an independent support service to make sure everybody's best interests are taken care of legally.
Do we need a lawyer?
For a self service separation, no, you don't necessarily need a lawyer. However in this case, you must be very sure about your knowledge of the law and the divorce process before you start your separation journey. Failing this may cost you time and repeat court costs.
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If your separation journey is one that is not amicable, you will need a lawyer to represent you and your interests in court. Use them wisely so as to make sure you get the best value for your money.
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There is no right or wrong decision about engaging a lawyer. Even self service or mediated separations may benefit from one, as they can provide an independent opinion on your self drafted separation agreement.
This ensures that all parties are clear that any documents you agree on are legally enforceable.
What questions should I ask my lawyer?
Ask your lawyer questions about the separation process, the potential outcomes and timelines. Before talking to them, fill out and send them our Questionnaire so that they can from a view on your situation.
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You can also download a list of questions from us to ask them.
What are the requirements for divorce?
By law, you and your partner must be married for at least 2 years. This is irrespective of which separation path that you choose.
If you are not married for 2 years, there is an appeal process based on 'exceptional circumstances or hardship'.
To go down this route, you will need a lawyer to assist you.
What law does a self service or mediated separation fall under?
If you and and your partner mutually agree to separate, this falls under Section 52 of the Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976, commonly know as the LRA.
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The LRA is a law at the federal level, meaning it is the enacted the same way in all states across Malaysia.
What law does a negotiated or court decided separation fall under?
This is known as a contested separation and falls under Section 53(1) of the LRA.
It requires the marriage to have 'irretrievably broken down'.
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There are 4 reasons that this may occur:
1. Your partner has committed adultery.
2. Your partner has behaved in such a way that you cannot reasonably be expected to continue living with them.
3. Your partner has deserted you for at least 2 years.
4. You and your partner have lived apart for at least 2 years continuously.
If I am a foreigner, can I still divorce in Malaysia?
If you and your partner were married under the law in Malaysia, then yes, you can follow the same separation process.
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If you were not married in Malaysia, but live in Malaysia, this is a more complex case. You may divorce in the country you were married in and obtain the divorce certificate. Upon return to Malaysia, you must obtain a declaration order from the Malaysian high court. Both of these then can be presented to JPN to register your divorce.
We made a pre-nup, is it valid?
As long as it is not contrary to the law, then it may be allowed. However, the LRA does not explicitly mention either accepting or disallowing such agreements. A court will have the final decision on the validity.
I can't afford a lawyer, what can I do?
You can apply to the Legal Aid Department (LAD) under Jabatan Bantuan ​Guaman (JBG). Lawyer costs are subsidized, so depending on the complexity of your case, your cost will vary. Court costs however, are free.
The Bar Council Legal Aid Centre (LAC) also provides similar legal advice to the LAD. Under their support, costs for a lawyer are free. However, the costs for the court must be paid by you as usual.
It is best to contact each organization for the most updated details and your applicability, based on your income and situation.
What is the appeal process?
If you disagree with the decision made by the court, you can file for an appeal 30 days after the divorce order was issued. For appeal topics that involve children, there can be some leeway in this timeframe.
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Speak to your lawyer about the best process if you decide to file an appeal.
Why does it take 3 months to issue the divorce certificate?
After the court hears your case and approves the divorce, they issue a temporary divorce certificate called a decree nisi under Section 61(1) of the LRA. This technically enables you to cancel your divorce within those 3 months it is valid.
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If not cancelled, then after 3 months a divorce certificate is officially issued.
Where can I find more information about the divorce process?
JPN is the official source for non-Muslim marriage and divorce registration in Malaysia. You can find official forms and documents required there.